When Smiling Was Easier
by Ell Roche
Summary: Her house was empty. Lonely. She'd take SS mission after SS mission just so she wouldn't have to listen to the silence screaming in her mind every night.


**Title:** When Smiling was Easier

**Pairing:** Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruko

**Warnings:** AU, genderbending, and some dark thoughts/violence.

**Summary:** Her house was empty. Lonely. She'd take SS mission after SS mission just so she wouldn't have to listen to the silence screaming in her mind every night.

* * *

Uzumaki Naruko leaned against the tree trunk, fifty feet in the air. The leaves rustled in the breeze as she peered through the darkness. The gates of Konoha were within one minute's travel, but she couldn't bear the thought of going home at this hour. The blank mask, once stifling, was now a comfort; it hid her features, allowing Naruko the privacy necessary to be herself. For once, she didn't have to paint a smile on her face.

Smiling had been easier, natural, when she was younger.

That was back when Team Seven was still a team. That was before she and Haruno Sakura entered into a silent struggle for Uchiha Sasuke's attention. Back before Hatake Kakashi blew off her training. Before she left to train with Jiraiya, and before Sasuke betrayed Konoha. Before she returned to Konoha . . . long before she became a chuunin, jounin, and, finally, an ANBU.

Naruko reached up and caressed her mask. It was white, without adornment. She had refused to have an animal's face painted on it. Instead, she left it as blank and pale as a ghost—one of her worst fears. Oh, she could have taken the ironic path. Naruko could have built a reputation as the Bloody Fox, or something equally boring and cliché. That was expected, though, and Naruko prided herself on being the Number One Unpredictable Kunoichi.

For the past two years, she had been known as the Specter, because no one was ever sure if they really saw her or not. No one was ever positive if she was the one responsible for the beheaded corpse, or stolen scrolls, or pilfered goods. No one knew if she started the rumors that stopped a war, or led to a change of alliances. She was rumor, and mist, and unsubstantial to the outside world.

A string of pouches dangled from her waist. Two held the sealed heads of traitors that she had defeated on her latest SS mission; the bounties were large, but she didn't need the money. Two years of high-ranked missions had set Naruko up for life. If she had ever possessed a slothful bone in her body, then she would have retired to a large castle, married, and had children.

And while she did want children, she had long ago decided that only one man would ever do for her.

Sasuke had won her utter devotion when she was seven. Nothing could change that.

The 3:00 a.m. ANBU patrol sped past, not even recognizing her presence. Naruko stared after them, before turning back to the walls of Konoha. She didn't want to go home. She was tired of returning triumphant from dangerous missions, only to walk into an empty house. She was sick of saying, "I'm home!" and not receiving a loving "Welcome home!" in return. Naruko felt like she had been alone her entire life, and it was starting to drive her insane. She didn't even have the stupid fox to talk with anymore, since her body had absorbed the last of it on her eighteenth birthday two weeks ago.

Of course, she could always go wake up her friends; she knew that none of them would mind. But they had their own lives. . . . They were busy, and she wasn't likely to find any of them alone at this time.

Naruko watched the stars through the branches for a few minutes, and then sighed. Putting it off wouldn't accomplish anything. She had always been one to face challenges head-on, and that wasn't going to change just because she felt unbearably lonely.

"Better turn these in," Naruko muttered. She shunshined to the Hokage's office, dropped them on Tsunade's desk—it would be hers in the future—and then shunshined to her house. Well, the Uchiha main house, to be exact. She had restored it, and had taken to sleeping in Sasuke's old room; it was as close to him as she would ever get again, since there was a standing execution order on his head.

Honestly, though, she wasn't even sure if he was still alive.

Naruko hadn't seen Sasuke since the day he shoved a chidori through her chest. She wanted to believe that he was still alive—that he was out there accomplishing his dream—but she couldn't lie to herself any longer. There hadn't been any news other than the vaguest of rumors in much too long. It _felt_ like he was still alive, but that didn't mean anything. It could be nothing more than desperate, wishful thinking. No woman wanted to believe that the man she loved had died.

A kunai was in Naruko's hand before she realized it.

She had landed in the foyer, as expected, but things weren't as they always were. The lights were on, the scent of food wafted through the air, and the home felt _alive_, if such a thing were possible.

Before she could take a step, a strong arm wrapped around her waist. Naruko stabbed for the intruder's hand, only to be stopped by another pale hand. The fingers were long, slender, and masculine. There was a slight burn mark on his thumb . . . right where she had once caught Sasuke with a fire jutsu, back when Sakura was still terrible at healing.

The word escaped her lips without her consent, muffled by the mask. "Sasuke?"

"Welcome home, Naruko," Sasuke breathed against her ear. He removed her mask.

Legs trembling, unable to hold her weight, Naruko collapsed back against him. Sasuke was alive! He was in Konoha! And she was supposed to kill him on sight. Naruko clamped her eyes shut, so that she could avoid that most-hated order. Naruko would do anything for Konoha, to protect it and keep it safe . . . anything other than harm or kill Uchiha Sasuke.

He was the only thing that she loved more than Konoha.

"I'm home, Naruko," Sasuke said. "I killed Itachi. I accomplished my task. Now I've returned to complete my second goal. Do you remember what it is, Naruko?"

The words from Team Seven's first meeting with Kakashi had been engraved in her mind ever since that day. "To restore your clan."

Sasuke pulled her tightly to his chest and rubbed his nose down her cheek. "I need your help with that, Naruko. You're the only woman I'd ever trust with my children." His right hand slid down to cover her womb. "You're the only woman I could ever trust . . ." his voice lowered, becoming harder to hear, "with my heart."

It was everything Naruko had ever longed for him to say. That meant she shouldn't trust his words. That meant she shouldn't trust him. But she wanted to trust him—even when he had betrayed Konoha (and, in consequence, her) she had always trusted him. Because when Naruko was a little, orphaned girl—alone and hated of all—Sasuke noticed her. Sasuke paid attention to her. Sasuke befriended her. Sasuke gave her a reason to smile and a reason to live.

She owed him a debt she could never repay.

As if he could sense her worries, Sasuke said, "I've already spoken with the Hokage. I'm cleared of all charges, since I brought Itachi's head home with me. I'm here to stay, Naruko. I promise. Forever."

Naruko sucked in a deep breath, the words of the only other promise Sasuke had ever made to her replaying in her head: _I'll come back for you, dobe_. He was here, wasn't he? He had kept his word, hadn't he?

A genuine smile covered Naruko's face for the first time in years. "A family, huh? Sounds nice."

Sasuke's laugh was warm and welcome. "Yes, Naruko, it does."


End file.
